At The Heart of It

After browsing everyone else's Valentine posts I knew ever so many would be pondering just what went on in Deranged Land! Well, we took the "mominit" in for a prevacation oil change! AND piled into the "dadit" (there's no in, cause there aint no room IN it) Woohoo! Then we got heart-shaped pizza's to go and came back home for our Hearty dinner...heart pizza and heart cake with heart sprinkles! All jealous or what!


Got my Ikea list made and my plan of attack on the big ass mall (though I don't think it should count when you have "repeats" of the same stores, that's cheating) Anti shopping activities planned for Hubby & Young One. Older One shall bounce in between for he made out like a cash bandit in his pre birthday activities. Now if I could just get the house picked up (& stay that way til we return) and everything packed...it would all be good. Who knew I'd procrastinate about packing for 3 days for 5 people. My well planned dog sitting mission has hit a few stumbles too. Joy. Well off to hide more goodies (aka shut up, we are NOT there yet bribes) for the kiddo's backpacks o' fun. What magazines do 18 year olds read these days? God, I am old.

More lists. Must make a trip to the ol' HellMart..... I am in so much trouble when the Princess can really talk. Hmm, maybe then I will HAVE to shop alone! Not such a bad thing, I think I remember how.

To post in Feb or not

Ok, so I thought I'd just skip a post this month to see if anyone would notice. But racing mind needed a space.

I stumbled on a webpage that sends you "inspirational" mothering "tips". This one is so obvious, yet I hadn't ever thought of it quite like this. Even with swapping horrid parent stories from our youth with Hubby.




Vow to always remember this is your childrens one and only childhood.

Since they will never have another, promise to make the one they do have the
best you possibly can by loving them with all you’ve got.




I love my children. But I can honestly say I don't always do my best. I fear screwing them up. I worry about it. They are spoiled, but do they know how much they really mean to me? I am guilty of not showing enough "love" and/or "good attention". How does this happen? I should be fully aware ALL the TIME what that feels like. I lived it. Yet, here I am doing the same thing. I know I feel differently about my oldest son compared to my "others". It's not a good thing. It is not his fault how our life was back then nor are the feelings of contempt I feel towards his father. OlderOne has a better life now, but he doesn't have the same closeness as when it was just the two of us. Is it the tween years that have driven this wedge in my heart/mind. Is it just me, taking something out on him that is in no way his fault.

11 years. That doesn't leave me a whole lot of time to undo my wrongs before it's too late.

I need counseling, just afraid they'll commit me.

See, shoulda skipped this month.